Aaaah, I love these summer months. One of my favorite things to do is to take long hikes in nature. I’m in bliss walking through the beautiful redwood forests of Northern California (if you’re ever in Northern California or Oregon, you must go to visit the amazing redwood trees).

I particularly appreciated my hike this last weekend, after returning from a week in Taipei, Taiwan. Taipei is a crowded city, with high humidity in the summer. While I loved the people there and had a fantastic time giving a Happy for No Reason workshop to about 500 participants, I returned home craving nature.

So on my long hike on Saturday, I found myself wanting to take in as much fresh air as I could. But I had a hard time on the difficult uphill section–I was out of breath and gasping for air.

Then I remembered the advice of my good friend, Dr. John Douillard, who said that when you breathe in and out through your mouth you’re exhausting and aging yourself. Years ago he taught me a different way to breathe that increases energy, reverses aging, and promotes greater happiness and well-being.

John called it “Darth Vader” breathing, because when you’re doing it right, you sound just like the Star Wars character. In yoga circles it’s called “Ocean Breath” (it also sounds like the ocean) or ujjayi pranayama, which translates as “the breath that gives victory over fear.” I call it bliss breathing, because it always makes me feel joyful.

John recommends breathing this way while meditating, sitting at your desk, or exercising, so I tried it during my hike. I quickly noticed I was no longer out of breath, and I was feeling more energy-even though I was trudging up a steep hill. Within minutes, I felt a bliss that lasted throughout the day. It worked!

Modern scientific studies are now catching up with ancient wisdom showing that breathing properly can make us feel good-fast. Darth Vader breathing creates a healing response in the body. As the lungs absorb more oxygen, circulation and metabolism improve. This increases your overall life energy.

So anytime you’re feeling down or sluggish, try Darth Vader breathing. It’s easy but powerful. Here’s how:

1. Start by inhaling and exhaling through your mouth, pulling the air from the back of the throat to make it sound like Darth Vader. You will feel the back of the throat slightly constricting. (You can also imagine you’re fogging up a pair of glasses.

2. Once you get the hang of the sound, close your mouth, and continue inhaling and exhaling in the same way. Take slow and deep breaths. When you’re doing it correctly, you’ll hear the breath coming in and going out. This is the sound people make right before they go to sleep, when they are very relaxed.

Whether you’re on a wonderful summer hike (or winter hike for those in the southern hemisphere), exercising at your gym, or just sitting at home or work, practice breathing your way to greater happiness, love, and bliss!

With love for no reason and every reason,

Marci

What’s the #1 ingredient for a happy life? Scores of studies show that the greatest predictor for happiness is the quality of your relationships and your social support system.

We human beings — social animals — are hardwired such that family, tribe, and a sense of belonging are key to our well-being.

I recently saw a wonderful new documentary film called Happy (which I was honored to be the narrator for), that underscored this. Roko Belic, the film’s creator, traveled around the world to find the sources of happiness for people in many different cultures. It was stunning to see how families and communities in Louisiana, Norway, Okinawa, India and the Masai tribe of Africa all shared this same basic need for belonging.

It made me stop and think about my own “families.” There are many “family systems” that we belong to — among them are our birth family, our soul family, our work family, our community family, and our world family. But let’s look at the two that most directly impact our day-to-day happiness: our birth family and our soul family.

First, birth family. Aah, this interesting collection of people you ended up being related to. In the ideal world, your family is made of people with whom you share unconditional love. They’re the ones who stick by you through thick and thin. They’re also the people who can present to you your biggest life lessons (not always fun, but important nonetheless).

I’m more aware than ever of my need for this family. Now that both my parents are gone and I’m single, in my fifties, and with no children, I’m deeply appreciating the family that I have.

Over twenty years ago, my wise parents began a wonderful family tradition. Every year starting when my nephews and niece were quite young, they would take my brother and sister and their families and me on a big family vacation. It didn’t really matter where we went, just that we were experiencing an adventure together. Since we didn’t live near each other, this is how I got to know my nephews and niece.

We decided to keep up the tradition even though our parents are gone. I’m on the plane right now flying home from our latest family adventure in Quebec, and my eyes are filled with tears of gratitude to my parents for having started this tradition. We aren’t a perfect family — we certainly have our “stuff,” but we’re there for each other, and I feel fortunate.

And then there’s the soul family — this is the family you selected because your spirit resonates with them. They’re the people with whom you share a similar vision and values.

One of my favorite things to do is have my soul family over for dinner and games. (They’ve nicknamed me the “queen of Whole Foods take-out” since I ask them over for dinner but never really cook for them.)

Throughout your life, your soul family may change as you change and grow, but they’re the ones who really “get” who you are.

Here are a few things you can do to savor your families:

1. Appreciate your birth family. Focus on forgiveness where you need to. Remember that if you have issues and resentment with any family members, it’s hurting you much more than it is hurting them. You forgive for your sake. (My favorite forgiveness practice is the Ho’oponopono technique that I describe in Love for No Reason).

2. Stay connected with your soul family. Call them, write them a sweet email, find out what’s up with them.

3. Take time to experience life adventures with each of your families. It doesn’t have to be a huge deal. If they live nearby, take an afternoon to go on a hike or have a picnic. If they don’t live nearby, enjoy the time you do get to spend together-have fun!

Recently I came across this quote and was surprised to see that it was by Albert Einstein: “Rejoice with your family in the beautiful land of life!”

With love for no reason and every reason,

Marci