Today is the day of love celebrated by billions of people in the world (wouldn’t it be nice if we all celebrated love every day). Though this day is generally focused on romantic love, you can have an exquisite, extraordinary love-filled day whatever your relationship status is.

I’m in the “single” crowd and I’m not letting that stop me from total all-out love today.

So here’s the plan to celebrate this Valentine’s Day in the most fantastic way — whether you’re single, in a not-so-happy relationship or in the relationship of your dreams.

Since all love starts with self-love, focus today on ways to love, care for, and appreciate yourself and watch how you feel. While it’s a great day for giving love and appreciation to all those around you, it’s also a great day to practice receiving love from yourself and others.

Here are Ten Tips for Your Best Valentine’s Day and Beyond (adapted from Love for No Reason):

1. Practice Self-Love. Try a simple self-love technique that will open your heart. A few times today, ask yourself, What’s the most loving thing I can do for myself right now? Then pay attention to the answer and actually do it. When you love and take care of yourself, it inevitably serves everyone.

2. Anchor Yourself in Safety. Feeling stressed, unsupported, or afraid takes love off-line. Whenever you feel a bit stressed, take a few deep breaths and consciously relax your pelvic floor, located at the base of your body. This will kick-start what Dr. Eva Selhub calls your body’s “love response.”

3. Give Freely. Whether you are giving a gift to a loved one or doing acts of kindness for a stranger, giving opens the heart. Even if you don’t have a romantic partner this Valentine’s Day, you have the opportunity to offer gifts, words, or acts of kindness to many people around you

As a gift to you this Valentine’s Day, I’m giving away 5 free copies of Love for No Reason. Go to my Facebook page and see how you can get your copy.

4. Let Love In. Receiving from others is an act of love and connection that opens your heart. When you receive, your levels of serotonin — the neurotransmitter of well-being and happiness — rise just as much as when you give. The next time someone offers you a gift, a compliment, or some support, graciously receive it. Smile and say thank you, while consciously feeling appreciation in your heart.

5. Live with a Grateful Heart. Pay attention to and savor all that you’re receiving in life right now. Gratitude is the fast track to love. List five things you are grateful for today and everyday.

6. Speak the Language of Love. Tell others that you appreciate them — that amps up the vibration of love. When you speak directly from the place of unconditional love inside, you touch that same love in the people you’re speaking to.

7. Unleash the Power of Forgiveness. If you’re holding on to any resentments or grudges — past or present — they’re blocking your ability to love. Use the ancient Hawaiian Kahuna technique of Ho’oponopono to release and forgive. Repeat silently over and over in your heart, “I’m sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you. I love you.” Based on the principle of taking total responsibility for everything that happens to you, Ho’oponopono allows you to bring the vibration of pure forgiveness into any situation.

8. Sense Your Support. Einstein once said that the most important decision you can make is whether to believe you live in a friendly universe — one that is always supporting you. Assume that the universe is on your side. If things aren’t going the way you’d like, ask this question:If this were happening for a Higher Purpose, what could that be?

9. Feel Your Feelings. Stuffing your emotions or overly expressing them crimp your capacity to experience love. Instead practice opening completely to the feelings you tend to resist (sadness, anger, etc.) as they move through you-when you feel them fully, the discomfort will dissolve.

10. Plug in to a Larger Heart. Recharge your spiritual batteries by taking some time today in silence, meditation, or prayer. Tapping into this inner wellspring of spirit will boost your capacity to experience love by a factor of infinity.

Following these ten tips will help you live in a state of unconditional love all the time — not just on Valentine’s Day. Imagine feeling love, no matter what’s going on in your relationships or in your life, because you’re connected to a state of pure love within yourself — that’s Love for No Reason.

Please share with me your Valentine’s tips on my Facebook page (and see how you can get your free copy of Love for No Reason).

Thank you for being my Valentine — I’m so grateful that you’re in my life. I wish you the most love-filled Valentine’s Day ever!

With love for every reason,

Marci

P.S. Enjoy this one-minute heart-opening video here.

Aaah.  A New Year!  Woo-hoooo.

What I love about the new year is that we get a fresh start.  Right now, you have a fantastic opportunity– you get to leave behind what didn’t work in 2011 and envision what you’d like to create in 2012.  As this quote says:

“Cheers to a new year and another chance for us to get it right.”  – Oprah Winfrey

For the past ten years, I’ve had a simple New Year’s ritual that’s been a great way to ring in the new.  I’ve shared it with a few friends who’ve loved doing it, so I want to share it with you. As the saying goes, Well begun is half done, so I suggest you do this either on New Year’s eve or New Year’s day to get 2012 off to a wonderful start.:

1. Start with a 10 – 15 minute meditation in which you set your attention on releasing the old and opening to the new.
2. On a piece of paper, hand write a list of all the things in 2011 that you’d like to let go of.  This can include old patterns that don’t serve you, grudges or resentments you’re hanging on to, fears that hold you back, or circumstances that you’d like to change.It can also include not-useful habits such as eating too much sugar or not exercising.  Make sure your list is as complete as possible with everything that didn’t work for you in 2011.  My list is usually a few pages.
3. If it’s easy for you to burn the list, then you can do that.  If not, you can tear the list up in many pieces.  As you release this list, imagine letting go of the energies that are represented on your list.
4. Now, on to creation.  Make a list of all that you wish to create for yourself in 2012.Include the habits you’d like to embrace, the external circumstances you’d like to create, and the internal experiences you’d like to have (joy, freedom, ease, love, peace, acceptance of all that is, etc).  Be as specific as possible.
5. Read the list aloud (whether you’re alone or with others).  Speaking it out adds more energy to it.  Feel each item as though it’s actually happened.
6. Put the list in a special place, as a symbolic offering for your coming year.

Notice how you feel after doing this ritual.  I always feel cleansed, lighter, renewed, and excited about what’s ahead.

Please let me know your experience with this and/or share with me any New Year ritual you love on my Facebook page: http://www.facebook.com/MarciShimoffFan

This is a special New Year’s for me.  I get to spend New Year’s eve in an extraordinary way.  I have the huge honor of officiating at my nephew’s wedding on December 31!    He and his fiancée are two fabulous people and they’re a great match — their relationship is an inspiration.  I can’t think of a better way to start the new year in this celebration of love.

May 2012 be a year for you full of wonder, grace, miracles, love and the deepest fulfillment of your soul.

With love for every reason,

Marci

P.S.  Something exciting is happening on January 10 — stay tuned for the news.

At last, we’re in the final countdown of the holidays! I’ve been waiting excitedly to share with you one of my favorite holiday stories (at the end of this article) and my favorite advice for fully enjoying the holiday spirit.

If you think about it, all the gifts, parties, and holiday fuss boil down to one thing — love. Love is the #1 ingredient we need to experience holiday cheer and the absence of it is what brings holiday woe.

So how can you experience more love this season?

Practice being a good receiver!

What you say? Isn’t this season about giving? Yes, giving is a wonderful thing that helps us feel good, but if we can’t fully receive people’s gifts and kindness, open up to support, and let love in then we can’t actually FEEL the love.

Unfortunately, many people have a hard time receiving. Here are three ways you can strengthen your receiving muscle this holiday:

1. Pay attention to the gifts all around you each day — not just the BIG gifts, but the small ones, as well. Notice the kindness of the salesclerk, the smile on your neighbor’s face, the beauty of the winter landscape. Be on the look-out for the many gifts of the day.

2. Look for the blessings — even in the hard stuff, which often shows up during this season. Just as an experiment, assume that everything that happens is a gift for you. The universe is on your side. How would you look at and experience your challenges differently, if you imagined it was all for your good? Give it a try.

3. Savor the good. My neuropsychologist friend Rick Hanson says that it takes about 20 seconds to deeply register the good. So, acknowledge a compliment rather than dismiss it, express appreciation for the gifts you receive. Deeply take things in and bathe in them.

I’d love to hear what tips you use to open up and receive. Please share them with me at http://www.facebook.com/MarciShimoffFan.

Now, for a fabulous holiday story (receive it and enjoy)…

A Happy for No Reason Holiday Story

I was deeply touched by the following story that was told to me by a young father, one of my “Happy 100″ who I interviewed for Happy for No Reason:

When my oldest daughter, Victoria, was almost three, we read Dr. Seuss’s How the Grinch Stole Christmas every night to her before the holiday.

She’d curl up beside me as I’d read: “Every Who down in Who-ville liked Christmas a lot. But the Grinch, who lived just north of Who-ville, Did NOT!”

Victoria followed along as the Grinch unveils his plans to ruin the Christmas of the Whos. Disguising himself as Santa and his dog as a reindeer, the Grinch steals into the Whos’ homes and takes everything, leaving only the hooks and wires on the bare walls. But to his surprise, the Whos remain happy despite the loss of the presents and trees and trimmings and trappings.

He hadn’t stopped Christmas from coming; “it came just the same.”

On that Christmas morning, we woke just ahead of Victoria so that we could watch her three-year-old enthusiasm as she saw the presents under the tree. She first ran to the kitchen table where she had left a snack for Santa and his reindeer. She looked at the evidence of Santa’s visit: the cookie crumbs on the plate and the empty milk glass and the missing carrots. My wife, pregnant with our second child, and I beamed seeing our daughter so wide-eyed and excited at the thought that Santa himself had been in our home. Next, she ran into the living room and saw the presents under the tree.

We expected her to dive into them — but she didn’t. She held up her little hand and she said, “Stop. Let’s pretend. Let’s pretend the Grinch has been here and took everything and left just hooks and wires and we’d still be happy.”

So we stopped, and were happy. And like the Grinch, my heart grew three sizes that day.

I wish you great love this holiday season and every day — may you let the love in fully and allow it to grow your heart three sizes.

With love for no reason and every reason, Marci

For the last three mornings, I’ve woken up with the holiday song “It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year” going through my head. (Those store soundtracks have an insidious way of taking over your brain!). My spontaneous rebuttal is “It’s the most STRESSFUL time of the year.”

While this can be a fun and fulfilling time, it can also be a time of great challenge. Depression is higher during the holiday season than during any other time of the year.

Is there a better way to live through the holidays so that you plug into the “fun and fulfilling” part and lessen the “stressful” part?

I’ve been exploring that myself this year as I’ve been feeling some sadness these past few weeks. This is the first time in 13 years that I am not in a primary relationship during the holidays and yet I still want to keep my heart open and feel expanded and happy.

I’ve found a holiday prescription that’s working for me and I believe will work for you. It’s based on dealing with the five main sources of stress that can lead to the holiday blues:

1. Overconsumption – We tend to over-shop, overeat, overdrink, over-everything! Can you relate?
2. Loneliness – This is time when we can feel most isolated or alone-even if we’re surrounded by lots of people.
3. Time Pressure – In the mad rush of the season, we stop taking care of ourselves.
4. Financial Stress – No need to explain this!
5. Loss of Perspective – With such an emphasis on buying the right gifts, having the right clothes for parties and gatherings, and finding the right ingredients for our holiday meals, we often lose perspective on what really brings fulfillment.

Here are the top five tips to make it through the holidays keeping your heart open and your joy flowing:

1. Connect to your heart. When you find yourself reaching for that fifth gingerbread man or cup of eggnog, stop and take a few deep breaths in and out of your heart. For extra power, place your hand over your heart to stimulate the happiness chemical, oxytocin.

2. Find community and support. If you’re alone, make sure you seek out people to spend time with. Don’t isolate yourself. Once you have people around you, focus on the ways you appreciate and enjoy them, rather than getting stuck in your judgments or criticisms. Yes, family can bring up your “stuff”-but see it as an opportunity to work on your limiting patterns and let love prevail. (You may want to use the fabulous Ho’oponopono practice to help you let go and forgive).

3. Take time for yourself. In the midst of the holiday whirl is when we MOST need to set aside time to take care of ourselves. One of my favorite ways is to take a 15-minute hot bath with sea salt and lavender oil at night to relax. It feels delicious and it rebalances the body’s energetic field.

4. Serve others. Giving of your time and your heart to serve others who are in need will help take your attention off of the desire to over consume. Altruism and service are a fast-track to heart-opening.

5. Go spiritual. The time around the winter solstice when there’s more darkness is actually a very spiritual time. Take the opportunity to go inward-meditate, connect with spirit in any way that works for you. Spiritual practice is the best antidote I know of to help you keep balance and perspective during the craziness of the season.

With some gentle attention on these five tips, you’ll find yourself humming “It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year” and meaning it.

May the next few weeks be nurturing and joyful for you.
With love for no reason and every reason,

One of my most memorable Thanksgiving celebrations was about ten years ago. After an enormous holiday feast, all of my family members sat around my parents’ living room unable to move (does that sound familiar?).

On an impulse, I grabbed the video camera and suggested that we all go around in a circle telling each other one thing we most appreciate about each other. My family reluctantly agreed, as they rolled their eyes thinking, “this is another one of those ‘Marci’ things.”

We started with my mother — I told her I appreciated how she always believes in me. Then my brother told her that he appreciated what a generous person she was, followed by my nephew who told her how he could taste the love in her signature butterscotch chip cookies, and on and on. Then we moved on to my father and did the same process until all twelve of us had been lavished on.

By the end of this appreciation feast, we had even bigger smiles on our faces than we’d had while we were eating the mashed potatoes and the apple pie a la mode.

There’s so much research showing the extraordinary benefits of sharing thanks and appreciation. But, we don’t even need those statistics to know how it feels in our hearts.

With the passing of my 93 year-old aunt this year (the last of seven aunts and uncles) and the passing of both my parents in the past few years, this is our family’s first Thanksgiving that my siblings and I are the “older generation.” We’ll be celebrating together at my brother’s home with “the younger generation,” and we’ll all be watching that special video together. I am so grateful that we have our appreciation feast captured on video and in our hearts. Why not celebrate your family and friends with an Appreciation Feast this Thanksgiving.

I send you all my best wishes for a Thanksgiving deeply full of thanks.

With love and gratitude for you being in my life, Marci

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